108.

This is the 108th post. I remember the first day I started blogging. Amy suggested it to me, and it was the best suggestion in the whole wide world. I remember when we decided to do this together. And I'm so glad that we are always connected in this-and Thursdays. I know that no matter where life takes me, no matter where we both end up...every Thursday I will think of you whole-heartedly.

"Life is shorter than we think."

As my fingers move to form sentences, Dave Barnes comes on shuffle and sings this melody to me. Jessica and I are planning a November trip to Tennessee to enjoy Dave Barnes, Ben Rector, and one of my best friends in the world. This weekend is my play, and next weekend I'll be in the arms of someone who needs me. I pray for her every moment I can. I am so excited for Denver, but I think I'm more excited to see Maggie...with every breath I love that girl more. The hope she keeps in her hand for Lexie. The strength that she keeps-when everyone else seems to be throwing their precious gift away...she is always strong. I love her so much. She keeps telling me how perfect the timing of my visit is...that Lexie is getting worse by the day...that scares me so bad. I'll only be there for barely 3 days and all that I can do is love her. That's all.

My other Maggie, my seemingly other half at times, is going through hell. It makes me hurt that petty little girl drama cuts the deepest. Cause it does. Especially when it's your Senior year and you're just trying to get by.

Jade and Sean are inseperable, and I am okay with that. I have a strange peace about it. I'm searching for more than a crush from afar or a silly little hookup.

There are so many thoughts rushingg through my head, and nothing to piece it together, but this is my blog so I do what I want :) I don't want to be this lazy, anymore. Though my life is hectic, there's so much more time for God. I know I'm not glorifying Him...and how sickening is that? Kelsey MOVE MOVE MOVE.

I cannot wait for my dreds, tattoe, and nose-piercing. That sounds so trashy all-together, but I need it. I don't know why-but I do. I also need closeness back. With my family. I miss my sister. God, I miss my grandparents. God...I miss You. I don't know how I am going to feel close to you again, because kamp is too far away for that...I'm slipping, slipping, falling away from You Lord. All I ask...is for You to not let go. As cheesy or mediocre as that sounds...just don't. I sadly lose faith way too easily. So I'll work on that and you just don't let go okay?